RE Q&A
by DevlHunter666
Summary: As the name suggests, you can ask any RE character whatever you feel inclined to. Fire away!
1. Chapter 1

DH: It has come to my attention that no one has any interest in my other story. As a result, I went with a new one based off a fairly old setup. In this, like many others, you may ask, or humiliate, any of the characters whatever or however you want. Leave a review with your questions or demands. Now, since we have started, I shall introduce my (non-OC) co-host, Lethe!

(cut to Lethe sitting next to DH on the couch)

Lethe: I don't know how I got talked into this either. (mumbles) Crafty beorc.

DH: I can hear you, you know. Anyway, the RE cast should be here in about ...3...2... Now.

-cast crashes through ceiling, save for Rebecca and Leon, the former landing on the open spot on the 3-person couch,  
>the latter landing and rolling in time-<p>

Wesker: Let me guess, Q&A fic.

DH: Yup.

Wesker: Figures.

Chris: How painfully humiliating will this one be?

DH: For you, and the other characters who I like, nothin' bad at all. Characters I hate, however...(glares at Wesker, Alfred, Alexia, and Carlos,  
>all of whom gulp.) Now, since I don't have any reviews, and no dares, Lethe if you would.<p>

Lethe: On it! (hits switch on huge-ass stereo system)

-New England Fall by the Sawyer Family plays-

DH:See ya! 


	2. Chapter 2

DH: We're back! And we already have reviews, by some twisted miracle! Lethe, if you would.

Lethe: Alright, our first question is from boomer101. It reads:

I have a question for Hm... Claire. No wait I have a dare for you. I dare you to find another RE Female character and make out with her and enjoy it.

DH: Something I should have mentioned: NO YAOI OR YURI! Now our next question, from Ceava Rose:

Uhmm.. I just don't get it why I'm going to ask Wesker first.. So.. To the question..

What is your birth month and day?

Wesker: Why should I tell you that?

DH: Because THIS!(DH and Lethe throw Wesker into a closet, the things inside causing him to scream like a bitch.)

DH: Next!

Lethe: From Resident-Scarlet:

Alright :)

Chris, has Wesker EVER, I repeat, EVER, screamed like a bitch?

Wesker, I loves you! But I am a yaoi fangirl so I love to torture you...I demand you make out with Chris! And enjoy it, while wearing a color other than black!

Chris, let him do it or..*points to the pit of rabid yaoi fangirls* You'll be taking a nice trip down their and back up for a kiss from Alfred, then Wesker, your choice.

Leon, I demand you torture either Chris or Wesker with something mind scarring! Also, you recieve truth cake

Rebecca, You are adorable, no hoo, so here is a cookie.

Chris: He just did. He also did during the-

Wesker: REDFIELD! I told you to NEVER mention that AGAIN!

Chris: ...big jockstrap incident at the RPD. (shudders)

Leon: 'Kay.(walks up to Wesker, and pulls out a #$^^& book.(Yes, it is THAT bad))

Wesker reads it, and then the sounds of glass shattering in the background.  
>He also screams like a bitch.<p>

Leon: Wait, what the hell is "Truth Cake"?

Lethe: Dunno.

Leon: Figures.

Rebecca: Thanks... but I'm allergic to peanuts.

DH: The next one is from

DH, after turning on the stereo and blasting out the Offspring's "Smash": That's all for now, people... And sports fans. I can only answer so many questions in a day. 


	3. Chapter 3

DH: It just dawned on me that still have no disclaimer. I, DevilHunter666, own none of the characters or objects in this story, and never will.

Chris: Why'd you wait that long?

DH: Distracted. Hey, Rebecca, you're by the stereo. Turn it on, will you?

Rebecca: Alright. (Turns on an Avenged Sevenfold album, MIA plays.)

DH: Thanks. Now, reviews. Lethe!

Lethe: First, we have ECDeadly.

DH: Hey! He's the one who inspired me to write this! I'm reading! It reads:

Ahaha... I see...

Read the first few chapters, seems like I have competition. ;D

But, I arrive not just to declare war, but to ask questions myself. Now, let us begin.

Chris: Did Capcom stabbed a vaccum inside and sucked all that muscle out, or did you stopped seeing the gym for four years?

Leon: Grew some facial hair in RE6. You gonna try to make it match your hair?

Vector: How does it feel, being the student of HUNK?

HUNK: Since when did you be all be sneaky and stuff?

Wesker: I heard lots of girls believe in Weskeranity. How does that make you feel?

Luis: Can you teach me Spanish? This grade can't raise itself, por favor.

Ashley: Did the president actually supplied you with Ballistics?

Claire: ...(can't think of some funny, witty question. DON'T LOOK AT HER!) ...HI.

Billy & Steve: Did you two drop the soap once?

Kevin: You failed the S.T.A.R.S. test a bunch of times..if you actually made it in, would you make a difference in history right now?

DH: 'Sup brah.

Good luck, I hope you become successful!

DH: Thanks.

Chris: I moved and had to change gyms.(saddened) I'm sad about it, too.

Jill: It's alright, Chris. I think you look better like that.

Chris immediately brightens up.

Chris: Really!

Jill: Yes.

DH: Your banter is cute, but we've got other reviews here, folks.

Leon: I'm probably gonna shave after surviving.

Vector: It seemed cool... It's not. He's a total ass!

HUNK: What was that, Vector?

Vector:...ome guy. Yeah, that's it. A total awesome guy.

HUNK: Damn right it is. Answering your question, I've always been like this.

Luis: If you can get me a hot date, I'll think about it.

Ashley: Of course not! Luis was just bein' all, like, perverted, and, like, stuff!

DH: Shut up, you!

I don't, like, hav-( gets, literally kicked out by Lethe)

DH: Thank you, Lethe.

Lethe: You're welcome. At least someone of your kind has some manners.

Claire: , are you alright? Your face is red enough to put Ada's dress to shame!

DH: Probably just... oh, you know... HAS A CRUSH ON YOU!

Claire: Well, he could've just said so.

Lethe (restraining Chris, who now mysteriosly has his muscles back): No, he really couldn't have.

Claire: Darn. Well, I'm single, and... (winks), I'm sure you have my number.

DH: NEXT!

Billy: Nope. I wasn't even allowed to shower.

Steve: Well... I... I mean... you know...-

DH: Times up! Hey, EC. Doin' good. Second chapter and all. Think I'm gonna end right here. I can't do dares involving villains. Sorry.  
> <p>


End file.
